Am I smarter than a fifth grader?

The answer to that is a resounding NO.

What happens when my 10 year old asks me to help him with his math homework?  Besides me breaking out in a cold sweat?

I say something like this:  "You know who is great at math?  Your brother!  Now...who wants ice cream?"

But tonight, both Dad and brothers were unavailable for tutoring so I was left to the task.  Two hours later it was clear to both of us that we were on a sinking ship.  Here is a snippet of our conversations:

Me:  "Now that you have solved the problem, just reduce the fraction."

Seth:  "Reduce?  Do you mean simplify?"

Me:  "Well, ya, whatever."

Seth:  "Mom.  It's simplify.  If a teacher says "reduce" when she teaches math, she gets fired.  My teacher said so."

Me:  "So can I be fired now?  Please?"